Good Times with Mo (Always Be a First Rate Version of Yourself) : March 23, 2009 blog

Notes from Olivia's Diary

Before I go to the hospital as a busy, busy doctor, my morning ritual consists of opening Sarah Ban Breathnach's "Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy", a daily journal feauturing 365 essays for women on everyday spirituality.

For the March 23 entry, Breathnack's title for her essay is 'Always Be a First-Rate Version of Yourself' where she writes that "we are constantly programmed by the world to be other women, not ourselves. With this pervasive social schizophrenia, it's no wonder that most women are terribly confused about the issue of their authenticity. To be authentic is to be genuine, veritable, bona fide, being actually and precisely what is claimed. THe only thing that we can genuinely claim to be is ourselves. . And our best is good enough."

While reading this book,I was also listening to the Twister on his morning radio talk show and he was talking about these four Spanish students who captured breathtaking NASA like photographs from 20 miles above earth using an equipment worth $140. I was so curious about the images the four students were able to capture that I run to my laptop and type in Mo's suggestions on googling 'spanish students capture pictures from a balloon'.

I zero in on one entry,London's Daily Telegraph which reports that:

"Under the guidance of their teacher, Jordi Fanals Oriol, the Meteotek team of IES La Bisbal school in La Bisbal d'Emporda, in Catalonia near the French border, took atmospheric readings and photographs last month with a digital camera lofted high above the planet by a simple helium-filled balloon.

Gerard Marull Paretas, Sergi Saballs Vila, Marta Gasull Morcillo and Jaume Puigmiquel Casamort built the electronic sensor components from scratch and successfully sent the latex balloon to the edge of space and took readings along the way.

Marull, 18, told the Telegraph the experiment was launched to see if the balloon would make it past 30,000 feet, which is the altitude commercial airliners fly. Instead, it made it to over 100,000 feet.

The 18- and 19-year-olds told the British newspaper they tracked their progress using an onboard radio receiver and Google Earth."

Isn't that amazing? The four students exhibited derring-do to the extreme, and the results were way beyond fantastic capturing the world's daily major newspapers.

I look at the 'Simple Abundance' book lying in front of me. It is true. We can find the sacred in the ordinary. We can start with ourselves. We think we are ordinary, but we can start by daring to dream, and acting upon that dream. We can be first rate versions of ourselves, as exhibited by those Spanish students. The results might surprise you, and confound you, just like the images beamed a 100,000 feet away from earth.

Goodtimes!!!

(Photo: METEOTEK IES LA BISBAL SCHOOL/BARCROFT MEDIA)

Good Times with Mo (How to Get What You Want and Want What You Have) : March 18, 2009 blog

Notes from Moira's Diary

I'm a self-confessed Pierre Bonnard groupie. Whereas Mo Twister follows his beloved Coldplay band around the world (I heard he wants to catch the March 23 Singapore or March 25 Hong Kong shows next week), I get a bit obsessive trying to see all the works created by this painter who has been dead since 1947.

Born in 1867 at Fontenay-aux-Roses in France, Bonnard is known for his intense use of color. Yet, when you view his painting according to smatset.com's Morgan Meis, "every wavy line, every strange color in the painting is carefully chosen in order to portray what it feels like to be in that room, not what it looks like, so much as what it feels like."

I see one or two works at a time, the last painting I was fortunate to see was his work 'Dining Room in the Garden' in Las Vegas, of all places. The Guggenheim Museum opened a branch in the Ceasar's Palace in Sin City, and I found this Bonnard amidst casino tables and neon lights. I forgot about my quite gaudy surroundings when I saw this magnificent painting. I wanted to just stare at the painting for hours, but the security folks were quite antsy with people lingering too long in front of the painting, so I took a picture in my mind and just bought my 31st book on his works.

So imagine the joy I experienced when I heard that 80 of Bonnard's paintings are to be exhibited in one museum. The joy, the joy!!! The Metropolitan Museum of New York is the lucky home for all his works till April 19, and I was determined to view his paintings no matter what.

As I was preparing my things for my impending trip to New York, I happen to listen to the Twister's show at Goodtimes, and yes, I totally agree with him when he often says that it's so unfortunate that creating wealth is not taught to our kids. Money is important because it makes our life comfortable, it makes you safe, it affords you to just jump on a plane when a Coldplay concert is playing in Paris, or in my case, a once in a lifetime major Bonnard exhibit is offered to the public.

I was fortunate to learn about creating wealth because at an early age, I read this book by author John Gray who wrote How to Get What You Want and Want What You Have.

Written a decade ago, the famous author of "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" postulates that "it is not enough just to be happy with what we have; we must honor our material desires as well." Everyone has the power to have more, and in this 310 page self-help book, Gray teaches how to achieve it.

Although some people might think this book might focus on blind positive thinking, this Gray book is a bit more complicated than that. A review from Amazon.com states that Gray "believes successful people experience unhappiness because they are cut off from their essential, unique selves by blocked emotions. He also posits that people who are not connected with the inevitable negative emotions associated with identifying desires cannot prosper materially. Finding and maintaining one's authentic self and allowing it to manifest its desires allow material success to flow into a person's life and enhance happiness."

I followed what Gray suggested, and all I can say is I've achieved almost all my dreams.

I keep a few pictures of Bonnard's work with me all the time. Some are used as my screensaver in my laptop, and some pictures are inside my journal. Most of the ones I keep are usually paintings I haven't seen yet and the pictures serve as a visual cue of what I want to achieve to see in the future.

I look at my journal now, and two of the paintings I haven't seen before is now in the current exhibit in New York. In a day, I'll be able to gaze at it.Hey good times!!!!

Good Times with Mo (Confessions of a Homophobe) : March 11, 2009 blog

Notes from Jaime

I'm a confirmed homophobe, and I'd be the first to box my brother senseless if he hints he's gay. I once did a mean sidekick to a classmate who touched my hand accidentally. I thought it was deliberate, and when I sensed it was really an accident, I calmed down and helped put ice on his black and blue hipbone. Ouch!

So there I was, stuck in the bowels of a traffic clogged Makati street, consoling myself that at least I was listening to some entertaining fare on the radio, good ole Mo Twister manages to keep me engaged with all the threads of his conversation, no matter how inane.

When the music sucks, I transfer it to chico and delamar's station, and I sometimes get amused with their seamless chemistry. Hearing their voices remind me of a sunny day at the beach with me holding a cone of wild strawberry ice cream topped with chocolate/caramel sauce. Delicious!

But sunny seamless days are not my cup of tea. I like some windy,rainy,foggy and dark days sometimes. The Twister's show keeps me amused, since it viscerally reminds me of our human psyche - sometimes dark, oftentimes twisted, but always at the end, surreal and funny. Like the show.

Anyway, tiring of chico and delamar's perfect weather voices, I returned to Magic 899 only to hear Mojo calling his father in Canada, with the Twister and Grace Lee prodding him on to articulate for the first time that he- Mojo Jojo is gay. Mojo apparently never said it in words, but just hinted at his condition all these years.

"Dad. . .?" Mojo starts hesitantly.

"Oh hi son," or words to that effect. His Dad's greeting was so warm and full of love.

"Di ba Lent na, and I've just been to Mass.." a gaggle of giggles from the funny trio here, who were snickering at the absurdity of Mojo thinking of a reason to blurt out a serious confessional.

"Dad, I'm gay."

I don't know what the Dad said, but he never once got angry. All I heard was that he wasn't disappointed at all. His voice was full love and understanding.

Frankly, I was just shocked at the conversation, and my mind was so befuddled I don't know how I worked that day,operating on semi-automatic mode to get through the day. I could not process at how the Dad showed so much love, at what is quite an unacceptable situation to me, if the same thing happened to me.

When the day ended, I thought I could finally relax. Unfortunately, my girlfriend had a lot of troubles in the office too and wanted to decompress at the end of the day.

Once I brought her home,I was just struck speechless when she plopped a DVD of "Harvey Milk" and Sean Penn came out of the screen as an unbelievably believable fag.

Coincidence?

I could not stop watching the movie because Sean Penn as Harvey Milk is just unbelievable.No wonder Penn won the Oscar as Best Actor last month! I could not see a shred of Sean Penn the person in any frame in that film. Macho, hard-drinking, alpha male Penn had disappeared.

Columnist Michael Sragow of the Baltimore Sun hit the nail on the head:

"As Milk, who rose to San Francisco's Board of Supervisors and became potential mayoral material, Penn breathes the character in thoroughly and breathes him out unself-consciously and passionately. His body language and facial expressions reflect an astonishing alteration in spirit, whether he's raising a fist in triumph at a parade or toppling into romance head-first at a subway stop with the pickup who turns into his most profound lover, Scott Smith ( James Franco).

"What's just as important as his gestures and movements are the sparkle in his eye, the laugh lines in his face and, when you can hear him above the fray or in the quiet of a lonely corridor or a private home, the resilience and humor in his voice. (In Penn's and Franco's characterizations, Milk and the affectionate, devoted Smith harmonize beautifully until politics tears them apart.) Penn the off-screen personality becomes deliberate and somber when he talks about politics on The Charlie Rose Show. As Milk, he creates a character whose passion is extroverted and infectious: Even his guile conveys a sense of play."

Seeing Milk's struggles with the establishment was awe-inspiring. I never knew gays were so ostracized and treated as sub-humans in San Francisco. They couldn't open a business establishment, or if they did, their neighbor merchants punished them by ignoring their existence. During the 70's, it was common fare for cops to raid a gay establishment and it didn't matter if they were well-dressed doctors or lawyers, everyone was beaten to a pulp.

After watching the movie, I could say that I still don't like gays personally, but now I think I see them with compassion. They deserve to live like human beings with the same rights as anyone (except marriage which I believe should be between men and women.)

I admire Mojo's Dad. If there's any great example of how to treat one's son, one's friend, one's sibling who has a same-sex preference, Mojo's Dad is the ultimate example for everyone to emulate.

As for me. Live and let live.

Goodtimes!!

(Photos of Sean Penn as Harvey Milk from www.iwatchstuff.com)

Good Times with Mo, Mojo & Grace Lee (he's just not that into you): February 25, 2009 blog

Notes from Ariel's Diary

I’ve been staring at these photographs of George Clooney in front of my desk at home,pictures I've clipped after reading it in a Time Magazine article a year ago. I particularly liked his picture on a bike and thought he was cute here, until that is, I was dumped by my boyfriend last Valentine's Day.

How ironic! Here I was sticking pictures of George Clooney on my wall, People's Magazine's Sexiest Male on the Planet, and the person in Hollywood who personified the uncommitted male. Was I asking a plea from the Universe to be dumped by my boyfriend?

I looked at the photograph of George on his motorcyle, and Golly Gee Moses! Was that fear on his face? Oh my, I get it. That's the expression he uses to a girl when he wants to run away fast.

I was listening to Mo Twister talk about this movie ‘HE’s JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU’ starring the notorious dumper Ben Affleck (rumor was that he vacillated on a wedding once before with JLO, and la Lopez forgave him. When he appeared unsure about going through with planned wedding no. 2, the divine Latina just called the wedding off!) and the beguiling, but nevertheless dumped Jennifer Aniston. What an unlikely pairing!

Long before this movie became celluloid reality produced by Drew Barrymore, there was a book with the same title hovering in the New York Bestsellers List for a number of months five years ago.

The writer,the quite dashing Greg Behrendt who was a consultant for ‘Sex and the City’ had observed the number of star crossed romances gone wrong, and one day, as he was listening to the women writers in the hit television show moan and groan about their love lives, Behrendt just finaly said to one gal to stop making excuses for the atrocious behavior she was getting from her boyfriend and just said, "You know what, he's just not that into you. Move on. Get a life.' That line turned into a bestselling book co-authored with Liz Tuccillo, and the book became celluloid reality and had its world premiere last week. Sweet!

Why didn’t anyone warn me to read this book first before embarking on a romantic relationship? It would have saved me a lot of heartache and all encompassing rage at my ex if I read this book first.

Guess what? I’ve replaced George Clooney’s picture with this other list on the wall. It’s a guidepost for me to read everyday until I get it.


1 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Asking You Out
2 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Calling You
3 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Dating You
4 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Having Sex with You
5 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Having Sex with Someone Else
6 He's Just Not That Into You If He Only Wants to See You When He's Drunk
7 He's Just Not That Into You If He Doesn't Want to Marry You
8 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Breaking Up with You
9 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Disappeared on You
10 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Married (and Other Insane Variations of Being Unavailable)
11 He's Just Not That Into You If He's a Selfish Jerk, a Bully, or a Really Big Freak

I've also reread a book that rocked the world of women called THE RULES by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, a Victorian guidepost of manners that surprisingly has worked well with a lot of modern romances. I read it again, and I can’t help but laugh, and roll around the bed giggling. I wouldn’t be putting this guidepost up my wall, but just the same, I’m sticking it in my diary. I’ll be trying this out with a guy I really dig. If it works, then it will be up on my wall in bold letters . Goodbye Clooney! Good Riddance.

To wit, here are the 25 RULES:

* 01: Be a “Creature” Unlike Any Other
* 02: Don't Talk to a Man First (and Don't Ask Him to Dance)
* 03: Don't Stare at Men or Talk Too Much
* 04: Don't Meet Him Halfway or Go Dutch on a Date
* 05: Don't Call Him & Rarely Return His Calls
* 06: Always End Phone Calls and dates First
* 07: Don't Accept a Saturday Night Date after Wednesday
* 08: Fill Up Your Time before the Date
* 09: How to Act on Dates 1,2, & 3 End the date first especially if you like him.
* 10: How to Act on Dates 4 through Commitment Time
* 11: Always end the date first
* 12: Stop Dating Him if He Doesn't Buy You a Romantic Gift for Your Birthday or Valentine's Day
* 13: Don’t See Him More than Once or Twice a Week
* 14: No More than Casual Kissing on the First Date
* 15: Don't Rush into Sex & Other Rules for Intimacy
* 16: Don't Tell Him What to Do
* 17: Let Him Take the Lead
* 18: Don't Expect a Man to Change or Try to Change Him
* 19: Don’t Open Up Too Fast
* 20: Be Honest but Mysterious
* 21: Accentuate the Positive & Other Rules for Personal Ads
* 22: Don’t Live with a Man (or Leave Your Things in His Apartment)
* 23: Don't Date a Married Man
* 24: Slowly Involve Him in Your Family & Other Rules for Women with Children
* 25: Practice, Practice, Practice! (or, Getting Good at The Rules)
* 26: Even if You're Engaged or Married, You Still Need The Rules
* 27: Do The Rules, Even when Your Friends & Parents Think It's Nuts
* 28: Be Smart and Other Rules for Dating in High School
* 29: Take Care of Yourself and Other Rules for Dating in College
* 30: Rules for Dealing with Rejection
* 31: Don't Discuss The Rules with Your Therapist.
* 32: Don't Break The Rules!
* 33: Do The Rules and You’ll Live Happily Ever After!
* 34: Love Only Those Who Love You
* 35: Be Easy to Live With

Happy Dating!! Goodtimes!

(Photograph of the gorgeous George Clooney by Sam Jones for Time Magazine)

Good Times with Mo, Mojo & Grace Lee ( Light at the End of the Tunnel): February 18, 2009 blog

Notes from Ariel's Diary

My boyfriend dumped me on Valentine's Day and boy, that experience felt like a derailed train ran over me twice. The pain was physical - I felt like my heart was ripped open and slashed into many pieces, and all the bones in my body felt broken and smashed into a gazillion pieces.To be honest, I wanted to crawl in my bed and stay there for a year.

But then I didn't want my Mom to worry so the next day I stood up and did my normal routine, all the time crying on the inside.

Anyway, I was listening to Mo Twister today as usual, and this dude really pisses my off sometimes when his radio show plays the same music again and again. Golly Gee Moses! Even the Twister acknowledged that his radio show is more talk show than music show, and I forgive him.

But then again, I forget my annoyance when he produces a jewel insight, or a funny audio recording of CNN reporter Zain Verjee saying peanuts like penis (and repeating it twice). I started laughing despite feeling like a dumped chick by a hot guy, which I am. Reality sucks!!!

My day considerably brightened when he mentioned this website F***My Life- where people can ventilate about their sorrows and rant about what bothers them.

I looked into it and I realized that I wasn't the first girl dumped on Valentine's Day.

Here are some samples of what's written in that site:

"Today, while at work I was reading "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" to me class of 5 year olds. I got near the end of the book and said "Look at the big fat caterpillar" to which one of my pupils replied "Just like you, Miss!"

Today, I received a box in the mail from my mom which I assumed was a care package. It was a scale to encourage me to lose weight.

Today, I spent $20 on a spray tan, $30 to have my make up done, and $50 on a pretty new dress all for a special date with my boyfriend. It turns out I spent $100 just to get dumped.

Today, I told my boyfriend that I was afraid our future children would be fat and ugly. He reassured me, saying that he was sure our spawn would take on after him.

Today, I saw my friend across campus, and I decided that I wanted to play a trick on her and scare her from behind. Turns out, I scared a complete stranger with really bad panic induced asthma.

Today, I made a couple videos of me playing guitar and singing some of my favorite songs. I arrived back from school to find my family huddled around the cam-corder laughing, imitating, and making jokes about the video.

Today, I was complaining to my mom about how my sister looked like a barbie doll next to me. I was saying how she was so tan and her hair looked awesome next to mine. She paused for a while and then said "Well you're pretty on the inside."

Now, do you feel better already? Check the site out and ventilate. You'll feel sooooooo much better. Goodtimes!

(Postscript: Notes from Ariel's Diary is fictional and comes from the imagination and point of view of the blogger. Photo of the tunnel by Vinay Shivamukar.)

Good Times with Mo, Mojo & Grace Lee (The Secret): February 16, 2009 blog

Notes from Jaceo's Diary

I usually spend a lot of time alone, gazing at spectacular landscapes such as this Sedona landscape in Arizona.

I start the day driving around a particular place, and when an area interests me enough to catch my attention, I stop, and with my trusty Julian easel,paint away for an hour or two until I complete a painting.

Many people see painting as a very lonely profession and it couldn't be farther from the truth. There's a sense of exhilaration that's impossible to describe whenever I see an empty linen canvas in front of me and smell the turpentine, and touch the oil colors that I'll use, colors galore that make my eyes crinkle in delight: cerulean blue,quinacridone red,rose madder,cobalt turquoise light, alizarin crimson.

I usually bring my Ipod and listen to downloaded stuff from my Itunes folder - a bunch of french lessons I really diligently listen to perfect my french accent; a couple of audio Tonight shows with Jay Leno (my brother-in-law records it diligently for me. He downloads it and listens to it in his office too) and an audio copy of one funny radio show from the Philippines called Goodtimes with Mo which leaves me in stitches the whole day.

I was listening to their Monday show and the hosts were talking about secrets people keep which were anonymously revealed to the world at large. It was so hilarious since many of the secrets involved people sleeping with their partner's siblings. That's with an s in case you didn't notice. I find it funny since I found the situations surreal. I just realized these people had a lot of time on their hands for titillating stuff which border on the ridiculous.

Whenever I hear the word secret, it means something totally different for me. I read this book a few years ago, "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne, with a lot of contributions from wise sages like Jack Canfield, John Grey and Lisa Nichols among other resource persons. There's been a lot of hullabaloo about this book, some good, some bad. I found the riff raff quite disconcerting since the principles espoused in the book has been around for quite some time.

I've known about the Secret for quite some time. For a very long time, I wasn't sure what my career path was, and I took a lot of missteps to get to where I am today. I read a lot of books to find out why I was placed on this earth. The more I read, the more I realized that the messages were quite similar. The message: You can be whoever you want to be, if you believe and work hard to make that dream come true.

The book helped me redefine what I wanted, a very easy guideline to create what you want in three simple steps.

1. ASK
Lisa Nichols :'The first step is to ask. Make a command to the Universe. Let the Universe know what you want. The Universe responds to your thoughts.'

2. BELIEVE
'Believe that it's already yours. Have what I call unwavering faith. Believing in the unseen.'

3. RECEIVE

Three simple steps. That's all. Trying having this kind of Secret rather than the other troubling, salacious kind. Goodtimes!!!!

(Notes from Jaeco's Diary is fictional and comes from the imagination and point of view of this blogger.Photo of the Sedona mountains by Krikit. Photo of the Arizona sunset by Threaded Thoughts )

Good Times with Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee (You Teach How Others Treat You) : February 12, 2009 blog

Notes from Marley's Diary

I was listening to Mo's radio show last Thursday and I was tremendously saddened when he talked about Rihanna's situation with Chris Brown.

What happened? They both seemed so young and so in love.

Did Rihanna have any inkling about her friend's violent tendencies?

I used to be a battered girlfriend by a seemingly kind man - gentle in demeanor; submissive, until a sudden unexpected incident triggers some malevolent, violent behavior and he turns into an ugly,ugly monster.

He slapped me once after an argument, and I forgave him once that time. But when he boxed me in the stomach after an innocuous argument, I fled from the malevolent ogre right there and then.

Never mind if he came crawling the next day with chocolates and flowers. I refused to see him and that ended whatever relationship we had.

What helped me was reading this great, if a little old book by Dr. Phil McGraw entitled "Life Strategies'. Written in 1999, his book had ten life lessons which helped me get through my hellish boyfriend situation.

If you're in a miserable situation, grab this book, and try to apply what he has written. I guarantee you that your life will change by applying the strategies laid out in this book.

In summary, these are five of his total ten life strategies featured in his book:

Life Strategy No.1 : YOU EITHER GET IT OR YOU DON'T

" If you break a criminal law, such as those prohibiting theft (or in Chris Brown's case- assault), you will pay a fine or go to jail. If you violate a physical law, such as gravity, you can experience pain or- depending on your elevation when you commit the violation - even death. Just as with these types of laws, if you break a Life Law, there are penalties, quite severe. I will bet that you have been paying dearly for those violations throughout your life.

"You break the current Life Law whenever you operate without the necessary information and skills to create the results you want. When you DON'T UNDERSTAND THE RULES OF THE GAME, SUCH AS WHICH BEHAVIOR WILL GET RESULTS, OR WHEN YOU LACK A STRATEGY, YOU ARE LIKELY TO RUN FOUL OF CONDITIONS AND REQUIREMENTS THAT WOULD GUARANTEE YOUR SUCCESS. In competition with those who do get it- that is, they do have the SKILLS,KNOW THE RULES, AND HAVE A PLAN -you are not even a threat, but a patsy.

"When I see people who just don't get it, stumbling along in life, I wonder how they ever survive. It's painful to watch people who do things when you know, before they ever do it, that their fate is sealed.

"YOUR STRATEGY: Become on of those who get it. Break the code of human nature, and find out what makes people tick. Learn why you and other people do what they do, and don't do what they don't."

Life Strategy No. 2: YOU CREATE YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE

"You are not a victim. You are creating the situations you are in; you are creating the emotions that flow from those situations. This is not theory, it is life.. You must be willing to move your position, and, however difficult or unusual it may seem, embrace the fact that you own the problem. While everybody else is still out there blaming those who aren't responsible for the results in their life, you can be as on taret as a laser-guided missile, and therefore, work only on those things that will truly change your life.

"YOUR STRATEGY: Acknowledge and accept accountability for your life. Understand your role in creating the results that are your life. Learn to choose better so you have better."

Life Law #3 :PEOPLE DO WHAT WORKS

"By now, it should be exceedingly clear that the behavior you choose creates the results you get. If you repeat the behavior, then by definition, those results must be desirable, or you wouldn't behave that way over and over. Conversely, if you do not repeat the behavior, then the result is not desirable. In other words, there is nothing in it for you.

"YOUR STRATEGY: Identify the payoffs that drive your behavior and that of others. Control the payoffs to control your life."

Life Law # 4 : YOU CAN'T CHANGE WHAT YOU DON'T ACKNOWLEDGE

"If you're unwilling to acknowledge a thought, circumstance,problem, condition,behavior or emotion - if you won't take ownership of your role in a situation- then you cannot and will not change it. If you refuse to acknowledge your own self-destructive behavior, not only will they continue, they will actually gain momentum, become more deeply entrenched in the habitual patterns of your life; and grow more and more resistant to change.

"YOUR STRATEGY : Get real with yourself about your life and everybody in it. Be truthful about what isn't working in your life. Stop making excuses and start making results."

And the most important, and which Rihanna should take note:

Life Law #8 : WE TEACH PEOPLE HOW TO TREAT US

" So if you ever wonder why people treat you the way they do, see Life Law #3 : People Do What Works. They do what they do because you have have taught them, based on results, which behavior gets a payoff and which one don't. If they get what they want, they keep that behavior in their repertoire. If they do not get the desired result, they drop that behavior and acquire a new one. Understand that here, as in all areas of your life,results, not intentions, influence the people with whom you interact. You may complain or cry or threaten to give them negative results, but if the bottom line is that you reward the behavior by providing a response that the other person values, then that person decides, 'Hey, this works. I now know how to get what I want.'

"YOUR STRATEGY : Own, rather than complain about how people treat you. Learn to renegotiate your relationships to have what you want."

So there, get the book if you need help strategizing. I know this book changed my life. I hope it does yours."

(Postscript: Notes from Marley's Diary is fictional and comes from the imagination and point of view of this blogger. Photo by ki-Ga)

Good Times with Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee (Confessions of an Addict) : February 9, 2009 blog

Notes from Adi's Diary

Surfing through the waters of California is an indescribable feeling. Your heart stops at a certain point, and you hold your breath till the waves die down, and you paddle to shore.

It's an ecstatic feeling that no words could describe. The high that one feels being on top of a wave, without losing balance and crashing beneath the waves is akin to experiencing a little piece of heaven.

There are a few things that make me happy - surfing; taking the time to talk to my wife and kids at the end of the day; eating chocolate cheesecake; watching the sunset in any California beach; watching the Superbowl last Sunday; listening to a goofy radio show called Goodtimes which a good friend introduced to me and which I continue to listen to everyday,and lastly, just lounging around the house on Sundays ,chilling out and watching my favorite movies.

Back to surfing. I wasn't like this before. Going near the waters to swim is not my idea of fun. You can blindfold me and force me to the beachshore and swim and I wouldn't do it. But at one point in my life, it was either swim or die, and I decided to live.

You see I'm a sex addict, and my addiction was overtaking my life and taking out whatever happy feeling I was supposed to experience.

I've been in therapy for a time, and I can't really describe in detail what a sex addict is, but according to medicinet, behaviors associated with sexual addiction include:

* Compulsive masturbation (self-stimulation)
* Multiple affairs (extra-marital affairs)
* Multiple or anonymous sexual partners and/or one-night stands
* Consistent use of pornography
* Unsafe sex
* Phone or computer sex (cybersex)
* Prostitution or use of prostitutes
* Exhibitionism
* Obsessive dating through personal ads
* Voyeurism (watching others) and/or stalking
* Sexual harassment

I used to be a purveyor of sexual pornography websites, and all I did the whole day was drool over these pictures.It got to a point where I was not talking to my wife and kids anymore; not even eating anymore, but sought my happiness through looking at these body parts the whole day and night.

I used to listen to Mo's show at Goodtimes, since a good buddy of mine from the Philippines introduced me to the show, and I enjoyed all the topics the funny trio of hosts dealt out to the listeners everyday.

But the show has become quite tiresome. All I hear day in and day out is about this website they're about to put up where you send photos of your private parts, and anyone can comment on it.

It's not just tiresome, but pathetic. One time, I even heard Mo asking a caller to send in photos of her naked self (without the head of course), and the caller was a bit reluctant in doing this. So what's funny about that?

I don't know. I think the hosts are exhibiting sexual addictive behavior, like myself before, which can harm their health. I also don't think they have real friends or family members who can really tell them what is right or wrong anymore. Grace Lee threatens to vomit if she sees anymore naked pictures, but do they listen to her? Hearing that made me so sad.

All I know is they've started to annoy me and I switch the radio show off as soon as they start becoming un-entertaining.

As part of my therapy, I've started to surf to take my mind off this obsessive sexual addiction. There's nothing like staying on top of the board, with the water underneath like a floor plank and just ride the endless powerful waves to make one feel fulfilled.

It's a powerful tool to focus on something other than behavior that can destroy my life. It's a never ending battle, but it's all worth it in the end.

(Notes from Adi's Diary is fictional and comes from the viewpoint and imagination of this blogger. Photos from moonjazz)

Good Times with Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee (Snowbound Day) : February 2, 2009 blog

Notes from Davina's Diary

This is what I see from my window today. They've just declared it Snow Day in London, and the streets are blanketed with unbelievable white powder. We haven't had this kind of snow in so many years. In fact, I don't know if I could work because I don't have a 4 x 4 vehicle, and I can't use a snowmobile to glide to work in the London streets. I'll be arrested by the bobbies in three minutes flat, what with London's surveillance cameras kicking in, in every street corner (haven't you heard, Big Brother is truly watching our every move here!)

A year ago, I would dread staying at home, and the sight of snow and ice would send me to the pits of depression.

In fact, a year ago, I was confined to a kind of loony bin hospital, and all I could remember was that everyday, rain or shine, I sat in a wheelchair at a particular time,usually morning,and we were led outside the grounds to bask in the sunlight. With the gloomy weather here, that's a bit of wishful thinking, but whatever wisp of sunshine we get, we're thankful.

Everyday our schedule was like this. After an hour has passed for our 'sunning' time, we were led inside the confines of our room, where we waited until the bell would ring again for lunch time; after two hours, it's recreation time, then finally dinner and lights off.

I don't remember the exact day I was confined by my parents. All I remember was that my boyfriend broke up with me this same time last year, and I slid in the tub and tried to slice my wrist. All my memories after that incident is hazy.

It is only now, that I'm up and about did my parents reconstruct the day to day events from my mental breakdown, and subsequent cure.Oh did I tell you? Yes, by some miraculous cure, I was able to get out of my blue, blue funk and recover from said loony bin. How?

Our nurses would play us music during recreation time, and try to interest us in all kinds of music. There was no response, but when a talk show on TV is on, the response was better. Name it, the nurses tried it - Oprah and Ellen were our top facorites, and according to the nurses, we stopped being in a catatonic state and started nodding, but there were no smiles or laughter.

One day, a Filipina nurse turned to the web for radio shows via live audio streaming and she chanced upon this radio show by the Twister named GoodTimes with Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee.

The patients who were lined up like ossified, petrified, mummified stuffed animals now started smiling, then giggling and then laughing and rolling out their heads from side to side.

It created pandemonium and the doctors all started running by the sounds the patients created. When they learned it was a mere radio show, they all started listening and subsequently cracking up too by the wild subject matters elucidated by Mo Twister.

From then on, all the patiends, nurses, doctors and orderlies got hooked on the show and we all looked forward to the taped shows created by a fan, and we just listen and laugh and have a great time.

After three months of a zombie like existence, the doctors started observing the improvements in my personality. I was still a little depressed, but it was now becoming more manageable. The good thing is, I don't need to take expensive medicines for any mood disorder. I still go to a psychologist once a week, but in three months, I could see the therapy sessions ending because I see myself getting really well from the depressed state I'm in. I've become a real functioning human being who can take reality really well.

The thing that helped me go through the toughest time in my life is listening to Mo Twister, Mojo and Grace Lee's show. Oh yeah, their music sucks since they play the same music again and again, and I hate porn, especially Mo's predilection to nubile men and women showing their junk and sending it to their yahoo address, which they'd eventually post in their JudgemyJunk website. But on the whole, this show beats Prozac and ten other mind numbing medications to combat depression.

Oh my, the snow has now hit my window sill. The white powder has become balls of rain and sleet and snow.

If this weather holds up, this city will look like "The Day After Tomorrow". But I dont' care. I could even look outside my window now, and just marvel at its opaque magnificence. It's so nice to stay at home and just curl up with a book and a hot mug of chocolate. The best thing is, I could tune in to that funny,funny radio show and just bask in laughter and happiness for three hours.

Oh glorious snowbound day!!

(Photo thanks to wolfiewolf)

Good Times with Mo,Mojo & Grace Lee (Notes from George's Diary) January 27, 2009 blog

Notes from George's Diary
Crawford, Texas

I find my circumstances quite surreal. I'm glad I'm in Crawford now, just lolling about, with lots of free time on my hands.

I've even learned how to use the computer, and boy oh boy, I thought the words 'surfing' meant you had to be in the ocean to cruise the waves.

One day, I chanced upon this funny radio show hosted by Mo Twister, his 'gay' friend Mojo and an Asian woman named Grace Lee laughing it up. I listened to it, and have been hooked ever since this so called 'ridiculous' retirement foisted on me. I don't mind even if it's based in the Philippines, a country I visited maybe three years ago? Boy, that visit was quite funny. A vehicle in our convoy stalled right in the middle of Quezon Boulevard, and the people in charge of my security almost fainted, until a quick thinking female security specialist revved the engine, bringing it back to life.

Anyway, this funny letter has been circulating around about my supposed letter to Barry upon his ascension to the WH role. THis is not true, although it looks a lot like my writing.

I could just imagine Mo Twister having a lot of fun with this one, even at my expense. It's nice to see someone happy; it's nice to forget about one's own misery, for a change.

It's not a miserable time for me. I'll be building a library and looking forward to a new role in the coming years. In the meantime, let me go back to my taped radio shows. It's nice to find the time to just laugh.

It's a good, good feeling.

(Postscript : 'Notes from George's Diary' is fictional and comes from the imagination and point of view of this blogger. Good Times!

The letter is created by Lee Camp, from the Huffington Post)

Good Times with Mo,Mojo & Grace Lee (The Purpose of Your Life) : January 13, 2009 blog

Notes from Aderyn's Diary

Brrr! The weather is turning so nasty, and road conditions around most of the country look like the Arctic express. In a few days, a polar bear in the middle of a street in any Midwestern town would not look out of place. Weathermen have warned that in a few hours, temperature would drop in their teens. Holy Moses!

Looking outside my office window, I see midtown Manhattan ablaze with lights and people running to and fro from their busy, busy lives. It's 7 pm and office hours are over in this part of town, and yet here I am stuck at my office, not because of work let me tell you, but because I'm struck mesmerized by what I've been hearing from a magical radio show based in Manila.

I discovered this radio show quite accidentally when I was working, as usual in overdrive, as a high-powered executive in a law firm. As day turned into night, then into day again, I would work, work, work till I drop for a few hours of sleep, get up and work again.

I listen to this Magic 899 show with hosts Mo,Mojo and Grace Lee as a way to lighten up my work load, and I listen from 6 to 9 in the evening, and usually when I'm done, there's a smile in my face that can't be erased. For a few short hours, I've forgotten most of my worries for the day.

My worries are not just professional, you see.

Here I am, in a corner office, a partner in a highly regarded litigation firm in Manhattan, seemingly happy and content in my killer lawyer outfits, defending presidents, CEO's, CFO's in their high finance crimes.

Love it? I hate it! I've hated my job for quite sometime, but I've managed to keep a tight lid on what I really feel. I've been in a high state of agitation for a time, unsure of what to do.

The pay's terrific, and I have a lovely apartment with a view of the Hudson River. I go to Europe for pleasure every time I want to, and life's pretty good.

But hearing Charisse Pempengco sing made me cry. I just realized that I don't want to be a lawyer anymore. I want to kick my job right here and now and just sing.It's pretty insane I know,but I just want to explore this career direction before it's too late.

Will this career direction ruin my personal life? I don't know. Maybe.

I've been reading this book "The Purpose of My Life" by Carol Adrienne for the past weeks. It's a book helping people find their calling in life. I flip it open it to a bookmarked page :

"If you picked up this book - curious about what it might tell you about your own life purpose - you may be feeling vaguely restless. You may be feeling that time is passing, and you are not far enough along in something that seems 'meaningful'. You may be longing for work that has shape and promise, and that makes you look forward to getting up in the morning. .

"Your calling has already made itself known though what motivates you (past and present), what attracts you, what you resist, and what frustrates you. Your calling may have made a brief appearance between the ages of three and eight, or revealed itself through a sudden interest in adolescence. Your calling can also be glimpsed in what you admire in others. It can be seen in those abilities you have that you don't even think are special. You are almost always working on purpose when you lose track of time.

"Some part of your purpose is also being served as you deal with obstacles and problems (resolving obstacles brings you great power and knowledge of a specific kind - necessary for your specific purpose). A piece of your life purpose may be fulfilled by the knowing that results from pain, struggle and illness. However, if your life is only a mountain of continual obstacles, then you are going to have to take another look at the kind of beliefs you have about life. Generally, when you are on the right path, thins flow. When you are attracting nothing but obstacles, you need to stop and ask yourself, 'What do I need to change in my thinking?'

"At the deepest level of consciousness, our collective question is : What are we here to do? We know there is something we should be doing. What is it? How can we all help accomplish this evolutionary task?

"Because we live in a world where we divide things into hot or cold, good or bad, light or dark, right or wrong, our mind naturally separates everything into either/or or black and white concepts. Interestingly, the reality of life and the underlying universal laws are usually formed into a paradox - which means both/ and rather than either/or. To be on the path of your life purpose is to learn to be comfortable with paradox.

"The first basic paradox of our lives is that nothing is fixed; and yet nothing is randomr or accidental, either. We cocreate with our spiritual source. We have free will, and yet we are not in control. The second paradox is that when we set our intention for what we desire, we achieve it usually only after we have released our need to have it. This is the paradox of intention(personal desire nad will) and surrender (letting God or the universe provide what is best for our highest good). You are both a finite earthly being, and an infinite soul of great spiritual dimension. You are both/and. You are the drop of water and the wave. You direct yourself, and you are directed."

Heavy stuff huh?

My life until this moment has been quite a seamless journey, meaning that what I did before as a lawyer is still part of my life purpose. But now that I've been restless and not feeling right in my skin, then it's a sign that perhaps I should attempt to answer the question - 'What am I here on this earth for? What is my true purpose?"

Adrienne answered this question herself when she said that "beyond any narrow category of occupation, the purpose of our life is to develop our capacity to love. Our purpose is to create life out of who we are and who we are becoming."

The ultimate aim is to develop our capacity to love. I am not nearly halfway there.Perhaps when I try to find a way to sing and spread happiness through this, then I spread love.

Meanwhile, I'm looking at a singing gig in one of the bars near 7th Avenue. Perhaps they'll kick me out, and demand that I take singing lessons, which perhaps I'll take in the next few months. These obstacles will be expected, but I know I'm nearer my life's purpose.

I try to listen to Charisse Pempengco battle against Mojo Jojo. There really is no competition.This little lady definitely knows her life purpose and I am very happy for her. Listening to her inspires me to pursue my dreams more. There's no stopping me now.

(Postscript: "Notes from Aderyn's Diary' was inspired by Charisse Pempengco's visit to the Good Times show. This is one girl who has discovered her true purpose in life.

Listening to her makes one wonder what would have happened if she purposely decided not to follow her true calling.

A life of mediocrity and pain, I guess.

For the New Year, I wish all of you to find your true purpose in this world. Imagine what the world will be like! I wish you luck!

"Notes from Aderyn's Diary" is purely fictional anc comes from the imagination and point of view of this blogger. Goodtimes!

Photos of mid-Manhattan by mudpig)

Good Times with Mo,Mojo & Grace Lee (Emotional Infidelity) : January 6, 2009 blog

Notes from Fr.Joey's Diary

If the weather is good, I usually walk to my usual spot where I meditate, a grassy knoll beside the football field, a tiny corner where no one goes except perhaps the red ants that I see crawling up and down my usual seat. What I usually see is a spectacular view of the rising sun amidst the mountains in Antipolo. I just marvel at the colors that seemed to burst from the sun: pink, orange, bright yellow. Amazing.

This precious few moments of silence offer me a respite from my hectic day as a priest, teaching a full load in college and graduate school, offering my services also as a psychologist in the Health Center of the university I am affiliated with. Aside from this, I give daily masses at noon and early evening at the university chapel. It's such a busy life, and yet I can't complain because this is the life I chose to serve God.

My daily schedule has been quite altered recently. I've been waking earlier now so that after meditation and prayers, I could tune in to the Goodtimes radio show to listen to Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee for an hour or two. I am usually amused by the synergy of the three hosts. They blend well together because it seems Mo,Mojo and Grace Lee represent different view points. I also like the way Mo's mind works - I consider myself a wide reader, and yet this guy seems to find one more news event, a piece of new observation that I have not considered, a point of view that's oftentimes controversial, but very current to the pulse of the times. This helps since most of the troubled people I talk to are young people, and this show gives me a sense of what they're going through now.

I found myself laughing at today's show though. I had to laugh when I heard Mo asking his co-hosts and his audience what they'd do if they found their partner caught red-handed cheating with another person. I found Mojo's answer quite hilarious. He said he'd cut his partner's nuts and push the 'people's elbow' against the other offending party. Such violence!

If only they knew the truth. There are many kinds of adulterous behavior, but the most common kind of infidelity is not physical, but emotional.

I've been reading this book of Gary Neuman called 'Emotional Infidelity: How to Affair-Proff your Marriage and 10 Other Secrets to a Great Relationship' and I'm struck by what he said on the first page of his book:

"All of us know that adultery - sex outside the marriage- is one of the gravest blows to a marriage as well as a painful rejection for one partner. But you don't have to have sex with anyone else to be unfaithful. Emotional infidelity is just as - and at time even more - destructive to your marriage. . Studies show that 73 percent of men and 42 to 52 percent of women meet their extramarital affair partners at work.

"Couples I counsel are absolutely outraged when I tell them that they could well be committing emotional adultery when they flirt with coworkers, send around funny e-mails to colleagues or hand out with members of the opposite sex at gatherings...

"There are ten rules for avoiding emotional infidelity:
Rule 1 : Keep It All Business at the Office
Rule 2 : Avoid meetings with members of the opposite sex outside of the marriage
Rule 3 : Meet in groups.
Rule 4 : Find polite ways of ending personal conversations.
Rule 5 : Avoid consistency in the relationship.
Rule 6 : Don't share your personal feelings.
Rule 7 : Be unflinchingly honest with yourself.
Rule 8 : Avoid cordial hugs and kisses or dancing with members of the opposite sex
Rule 9 : Don't drink around the opposite sex.
Rule 10 : Show your commitment to your spouse daily."

I know it's tough to hear this, but Gary Neuman has nailed the issue of emotional fidelity in the head. I hope more people would read it to educate themselves about the different kinds of adultery, not only the sexual kind.

The sun has started to become quite warm, and it's a hint for me that it's almost eight in the morning. Time for me to move out from my tiny piece of paradise and get moving to the realities of the world I move in.

I listen to the three hosts of Goodtimes, and they're having such a fun time. I'm happy that this show has given some moments of happiness to a great number of people. I look up to the skies and say a prayer of thanks that this show exists - to entertain, to educate, to provoke one not to stay complacent in their stale places.

I feel the sun beating down my skin. Time to move and face the daunting realities of the day.

(Postscript: 'Notes from Fr. Joey's Diary' was inspired by the show's topic of adultery in the January 6 show today. It was quite funny how the different hosts would react if they found their partners in an adulterous situation. It's interesting to see a priest/therapist's points of view regarding adultery.Contrary to what people believe, 'emotional infidelity' is much more common today, and more harmful.

If you have a chance to grab this book, read it and take notes on Newman's ten other secrets to a great relationship with your partner.

Goodtimes!

Photos by ῨᾂῄὐἄṜ )

Good Times with Mo,Mojo & Grace Lee (Timothy Hutton's Aha! Moment : New Year Blog)

Notes from Natalie's Diary

Just before the holiday break, I was mindlessly going through my daily routine when I stopped with what I was doing when I heard that Mo was leaving for a trip to Paris for the New Year. At first I was so shocked that he could go off to Paris just like that. It felt so romantic to just drop everything and leave family and friends behind to spend holiday festivities somewhere.

I'm a singleton in her mid-30's(Bridget Jones' term for single ladies. . Oops, even referring to Bridget Jones' vocabulary sounds so dated. Ugghh!), quite attractive, yet timid with regards to new experiences, new adventures outside my comfort zone. I'm a doctor slaving away in one of the major hospitals in Makati, dedicated to my patients, a loving daughter to my parents, a loyal friend. You can say I'm one of those nerdy bookish girls who have never minded schoolbooks as their constant companion(although I bloomed when I started wearing contact lenses and my body seemed to burst from its pre-teen boyish mold to what it is now.)

I listen to Mo, Grace Lee and Mojo every morning, right before I start my rounds and I sometimes laugh crazily inside the car, by myself, listening to their show. Sometimes, the show is the only break I give myself in my daily work facing patients with serious conditions dealing with cancer (I'm an oncologist, and it's heartbreaking sometimes to deal with patients who have a few months to live).

I am content with my life. Yet, something tugged within me to break free from my regular life when I heard that Mo was going to Paris. I realized that something was missing, yet I wouldn't do anything different until I read the January 2009 issue of Oprah magazine, and I read Timothy Hutton's Aha! Moment.One mention of Paris would make me think that it's a coincidence. But finding an article again about Paris later that day made me wonder whether there must be a meaning behind the one-two punch coincidence. Was someone trying to tell me something? I read and re-read the Timothy Hutton article:

"I was 19 when I got my first passport as an adult. I had moved from California to New York City and was living out of a suitcase, staying with friends. I'd just finished filming my first movie, Ordinary People, but I didn't know whether acting was what I wanted to do with my life.

While riding the subway uptown, new passport in hand, I flipped through its pages and imagined them filled with stamps. I had a lot on my mind that day. My father had passed away two years earlier, and soon afterward I found myself working full-time as an actor, so I hadn't had time to reflect on his death. Plus, I was trying to decide whether I wanted to work on a film called Taps. I started to put a lot of pressure on myself- I had to get home and make phone calls and read the script.But then I realized I didn't have anywhere I actually needed to be; therefore, it was time to be somewhere else.

A thought came over me: I have a passport, I have my first credit card, and I have $7,000 in the bank". I figured the best thing to do with a credit card, a passport, and a lot on my mind was to head to the airport and then decide on a destination. I'd done some spontaneous things before - an occasional road trip, a last-minute weekend skiing trip but nothing like this. Yet it seemed like such a perfectly reasonable and logical thing to do.

I got out of the subway at the next stop, hailed a cab, and went straight to Kennedy Airport. I had absolutely nothing with me, just the T-shirt and jeans I was wearing. The cabbie drove me around while I looked at all the different airlines and destinations; I finally settled on Air France. That was it. I plopped down my new credit card and asked for a ticket. When the counter agent asked me if I had any luggage, I answered No. A carry-on? No. Soon I was on my way to Paris.

I took a taxi to the one French hotel I'd heard of - the Ritz, where the only room available was the $2,000-a-night Chopin suite. In three days, I'd be broke. But instead of freaking out,I booked the room and went for a long walk. I had time to think about my life, about the intense couple of years I'd just been through.

In Paris, I felt free for the first time in years. Over three days,I must have gone to almost every museum and jazz club in the city. I saw Deer Hunter and was blown away by the soundtrack and the passion of the artists involved. Things settled down, and I felt a sense of peace. I returned to New York with a depleted savings account but a good idea of what I wanted to do with my future.

That trip made me a spontaneous person. My life's different now; I have two sons and responsibilities to juggle. Just last year,I found myself on the spur-of-the-moment drive from New York to western Pennsylvania, because I had the time and a desire to be alone. What I learned at that moment on the subway 30 years ago, staring at my blank passport, was this: If you have an impulse to do something, and it's not totally irresponsible, why not do it? It might just be the journey you've always needed."

After reading this article, I thought about it for days, then I've made a decision. Three days ago, I informed my shocked family that I was about to leave for Paris for a two week vacation. I never in my life spent a vacation without my family. But to vacation alone? They looked like I needed to be tied and sent to Nutsville City. My siblings asked me a lot of questions - Was I with a tour group? No. Will I go with a friend? No. Where will you stay? At the Ritz, of course (I was able to get a small room). What do I plan to do? Walk around Paris with no schedule, and with time to think about what I really want to do with my life. Was I going to go on any side trip aside from Paris? Yes. I was going to Amsterdam for a three day tour.(They were very puzzled about my choice of Amsterdam, but I wanted to go after I heard Mo describe the city). Did I have any problems that they were not aware of, which they could help with? No, no problems. I just want to travel and explore the world by myself. It's about time.

My parents saw that I was very determined. Since they've trusted me with my choices from the beginning and I never gave them any problems, I saw the shock at their faces at first, and then after a while, I could see the trust coming back, and relief? Were they happy that I was showing my independence at last? That I could stand on my own two feet, without them worrying all the time? My parents hesitated at first,and there were a lot of tears, let me tell you. But today, the day before I leave for Paris, my father wakes up early to catch me before I left for work and without saying anything gave me an envelope with a wad of cash.

"Have a great vacation, Natalie." My father was tearful, and then hugged me. "Here are some euros for you to spend."

It was so unexpected that I embraced both my Dad and Mom.We all hugged and cried. They didn't need any explanation. I couldn't really explain in detail what I also needed to do.

"I'll be back, Dad. Two weeks is just fourteen days without you and Mom."

One thing's for sure. I needed to find my own Aha moments, try to discover that sense of wonder to my life, which I felt I lost when I was mindlessly treating patients without any real inward purpose, except to gain monetarily. There must be a better way to live. That's what I intend to answer in the next few days. Paris, here I come!!!

(Postscript: "Notes from Natalie's Diary" was inspired by Mo's recent trip to France and Amsterdam a week ago. Fortuitously, I also read about "Timothy Hutton's Aha!Moment" at the January 2009 issue of O Magazine, and wondered about the need to go out of our comfort zone and explore untapped possibilities in our life by just being open to what the universe has to offer.

Be spontaneous! Be advenurous! Think outside the box! Those are brave words as the new year unfolds. A blessed New Year to all!!

Picture of Paris courtesy of innusa. Timothy Hutton's pictures courtesy of fortunecity.com)

GoodTimes with Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee: (A Happier You) Christmas blog

Notes from Alaia's Diary

There's something about riding in a plane bound home for the Philippines during the Christmas season. . I've seen it often enough - people spontaneously burst out clapping when they see a glimpse of home from their windows,still thousands of feet high above the ground, they stand up and give high fives to each other, the somber atmosphere of the plane is replaced with a fiesta atmosphere.

Often, this men and women have been separated from loved ones for years, often toiling in thankless jobs just to eke out a living to sustain their families back home.

I consider myself one of them since I work abroad as a nurse and send my savings back home to augment my parents'limited resources, helping five younger siblings finish their studies.I am just fortunate that I am single and I can afford to go home to the Philippines every year during my Christmas break, soak in all the festivities, stuff myself with Pinoy food and revel in my family's warm embrace.

I've learned to focus on the positive because if I don't, I'm sure I'll never venture outside my comfort zone,perhaps remain stuck in my home country and have a very low salary and perhaps sink in the dark pits of depression. Although I'm earning well, I can't help but ponder on the what if's.

I read a lot of books to combat my loneliness, watch Wowowee at the Filipino Channel (much as I try, I couldn't really stomach Willie Revillame), and listen to the live or delayed stream of my favorite radio show GoodTimes with Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee at 89.9

In fact, I've recorded a month's worth of shows in my IPod to keep me company as I ride home to Manila.

I've been listening to their December 18 show, and I was struck by Mo's topic about 'Missed Opportunities'. I've had a lot of missed opportunities to ponder about: my biggest regret is about not putting my foot down to study medicine. Instead, I was asked by my family to finish my studies first and work as a nurse so I could send all my younger siblings to college. After they're through school, then I could think about going to medicine.

What if, all those years ago, I've put my foot down? Perhaps, I'll be a doctor now. A penniless doctor, and my siblings are all out in the street, begging for food. That's quite extreme. Of course my Itay will never allow that to happen, and neither would I. But I do dwell on the What if's a lot of the time before.

I look out at my window and look at the skies. It's so beautiful and peaceful. So unlike the turbulent emotions I'm going through as I listen to Mo go on and on asking his callers to recall their missed opportunities.

I let the feelings of sadness overwhelm me at first and then after a minute or two, I let it go.

I look at the book I've kept in the side pocket of my front seat 'Oneness With All Life' by Eckhart Tolle, and stare at it. I've kept this book at my side ever since it was published. When I'm feeling really low, I read, and Tolle's words comfort me.

I open the pages and scan my highlighted words, words that have healed my depression.

Don't seek happiness. If you seek it you won't find it, because seeking is the anithesis of happiness. Happiness is ever elusive, but freedom from unhappiness is attainable now, by facing WHAT IS than making up stories about it.

The primary cause of unhappiness is never one situation but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral, which always is as it is. There is the situation or the fact, and here are my thoughts about it, Instead of making up stories, stay with the facts. For example, "I am ruined" is a story. It limits you and prevents you from taking effective action. "I have 50 cents left in my bank account" is a fact. Facing facts is always empowering.

See if you catch the voice in your head, perhaps in the very moments it complains about something, and recognize it for what it is: the voice of the ego, no more than a thought. Whenever you notice that voice, you will also realize that you are not the voice, but the one who is aware of it. In fact, you are the awareness that is aware of the voice. In the background, there is awareness. In the foreground, there is the voice, the thinker.In this way, you are becoming free of the ego, gree of the unobserved mind.

People believe themselves to be dependent on what happens for their happiness. They don't realize that what happens is the most unstable thing in this universe. It changes constantly. They look upon the present moment as either marred by something that has happened and shouldn't have or as deficient because of something that has not happened but should have. And so they miss the deeper perfection that is inherent in life itself, a perfection that lies beyond what is happening or not happening. Accept the present moment and find the perfection that is untouched by time.

The more shared past there is in a relationship, the more present you need to be; otherwise, you will be forced to relive the past again and again.

You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you and allowing that goodness to emerge.

If peace is really what you want,then you will choose peace.

I hear shouting and stomping of the feet, and when I look out the window, the clouds in the horizon has been replaced by a hint of Manila Bay. And when the crowd sees land, it seems the whole plane is standing up and clapping. The stewardesses are helpless, smile and just say 'Merry Christmas po. Malapit na tayong mag-land sa Pilipinas."

I dab at my eyes and clap along with the crowd. It feels so good to be home. I clutch the book I was reading a while ago. I choose to be present in the moment. I am trying to face the facts of my life at this very moment. I am happy.

(Postscript: The topic 'Missed Opportunities' was a topic Mo dwelt on in his Dec 18 show. This topic kind of haunted my subconscious the whole month of December because I wanted to write in this blog, but can't, due to the hair-raising activities we put ourselves through in preparing for Christmas.

But instead of dwelling on the what if's, and slide to feelings of depression, I just focus on what is, as the book 'Oneness With All Life' by Eckhart Tolle has asked its readers to espouse.

I've thought of a fictional character who've experienced a lot of missed opportunities in her life, and thought of creating Alaia, a nurse coming home to the Philippines for her yearly vacation. She ponders on a lot of what if's but instead focuses on the positive, as we should all do everyday of our lives.

I've experienced too what Alaia has seen inside the plane, when a group of OFW's spontaneously clap, and high five one another as they approach the landing at NAIA.This happens a lot especially when a plane from abroad comes home for Christmas. One can see absolute,pure joy in their faces as they land closer to home.

I wish you peace today. Merry Christmas!!!)

photos of the skies from the plane courtesy of genvessel

Good Times with Mo, Mojo & Grace Lee (Sleepless in Chicago) : December 1, 2008 blog

Notes from Triste's Diary

People have this mistaken notion that Chicago is a city of concrete and glass: a windy,turgid city with cold,soulless people.

Before I transferred here from Manila, I thought the same thing, but once I got here, I never realized that the city is surrounded by Lake Michigan, and that the people are very friendly and down to earth, reminding me that Chicago is a big big city with its Midwest values intact. Think of Oprah and Barack Obama's warmth, and you get my point.

I'm very lucky that the view from my boyfriend's apartment is just fantastic. I get to see the Magnificent Mile (the northern part of Michigan Avenue between the Chicago River and Lake Shore Drive)at all hours of the day in his 66th floor loft, and I never tire of the view, alternately looking at the harbor and the buildings lining by the lake.

It's ironic that the beauty I see outside does not reflect my current emotional state, which is miserable beyond compare! I long to go home to Manila and cry my heart out in familiar surroundings.I'm waiting for the weekday to end, and by Saturday,I might broach this delicate topic over dinner with my boyfriend. Hopefully, I'll be on the way home to spend Christmas with my family.

I'm homesick, and to keep my mind away from feelings of sadness, I while away my time listening to the Good Times show via their website. Or listen to the audio recording when I can't sleep at night.Today's show hit me hard. Listening to caller 'Jason' talking about leaving his girlfriend because she is not Chinese hit the issues affecting me straight in the bull's eye. It's serendipity. A perfect chance to reflect on my life circumstances this moment.

Like Jason, my boyfriend is Filipino-Chinese. I don't know about Jason, but my boyfriend belongs to the top '1% of 1%' category, meaning his family belongs to one of the richest families in the Philippines, as evidenced by his tony address in Lake Shore Drive where he stays while he finishes his MBM at Kellogg Business School of Management.

I don't have one drop of Chinese blood in my veins, and there lies the problem. I met X in Kellogg too, and we've been classmates since the schoolyear started in September.Being both Pinoys in a foreign land, we clicked instantly and in a matter of weeks we fell in love and lived together.

His parents learned a few weeks about it and visited us here in Chicago, and X has not talked about it, but I could feel that he got a lashing from his folks about my background. I'm distantly related to a President, two Senators, perhaps ten congressmen in the Philippines.And yet, I don't seem to add up to their standards? Why? Because my ancestors are not peasants from some remote province in China like Guangduo?

I didn't like it one bit. My boyfriend has been quietly fuming about it too. He just told me that if his inheritance gets screwed, then his parents can stuff their money up their asses. I had to laugh at that one.

It was funny but I had genuine worries. I love my boyfriend very much, and there lies the rub. If I didn't love him, then I'll just be oblivious to the cultural wars going on around me. But I don't want him to be miserable in any way.

I worry too about the shock he will undergo when he loses his inheritance for love. X is used to the Ritz lifestyle: he uses the helicopter in Manila like a taxi, I kid you not.

But to tell you the truth, it's the least of my worries.I wonder if he can survive the ostracism hurled out to him by his family. Will he be still be happy in the future when his kids aren't visited by his parents? Will he still look kindly to me after years of estrangement from his family?

I don't know, and that's why I want to flee to Manila for the holidays. I want to think things over. I'm afraid that this week, my boyfriend will defy everyone and go down on his knees to ask me to marry him. I don't want to see any kind of hesitation on my face.

It's a tough situation I'm in, and the magnificent views outside can't answer the doubts inside my heart.

But I can laugh at the meantime. I hear a dog-catfight in the background, the Twister fighting with Mojo over Jason's problem.

Oh well, a little respite like this goes a long way when one is deep in an emotional hell-hole. For a brief, brief moment, I allow myself to get silly, laugh out loud even if there's no one around. I'll think about my problems again after the radio show ends. In the meantime,I listen in again and Mo Twister is boasting about being in the cover of IQ magazine, and taunts Mojo for being in the cover of 'Dumb-Ass' magazine.. Uh oh. .here they go again :)

(Postscript: Jason is a real caller to the Good Times December 1 show, and his problem is about his conservative Chinese family's objections with his Filipina girlfriend.

It's a common problem in today's times, and I wondered how a fictional character would react with the same problem. Despite finding herself in luxurious circumstances, Triste is miserable, finding out that no amount of money could offset the emotional problems she is inenviably facing.

'Notes from Triste's Diary' is purely fictional and comes from the imagination and point of view of this blogger. Thanks to arch2452 for the Lakeshore Drive photos from the viewpoint of the John Hancock building and the Chicago Harbor. A big thank you too to earnshavian for the view of Lake Michigan during sunset.

I was fortunate to stay at the John Hancock building for a time visiting relatives who lived in this iconic building, and the views are just truly awesome from a very high floor. Many mornings, the window views were foggy because I was literally nose to nose with cloud formations - it was that high! I thought it would be nice to share this experience to all of you readers. Goodtimes!!)