Notes from Ariel's Diary
I’ve been staring at these photographs of George Clooney in front of my desk at home,pictures I've clipped after reading it in a Time Magazine article a year ago. I particularly liked his picture on a bike and thought he was cute here, until that is, I was dumped by my boyfriend last Valentine's Day.
How ironic! Here I was sticking pictures of George Clooney on my wall, People's Magazine's Sexiest Male on the Planet, and the person in Hollywood who personified the uncommitted male. Was I asking a plea from the Universe to be dumped by my boyfriend?
I looked at the photograph of George on his motorcyle, and Golly Gee Moses! Was that fear on his face? Oh my, I get it. That's the expression he uses to a girl when he wants to run away fast.
I was listening to Mo Twister talk about this movie ‘HE’s JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU’ starring the notorious dumper Ben Affleck (rumor was that he vacillated on a wedding once before with JLO, and la Lopez forgave him. When he appeared unsure about going through with planned wedding no. 2, the divine Latina just called the wedding off!) and the beguiling, but nevertheless dumped Jennifer Aniston. What an unlikely pairing!
Long before this movie became celluloid reality produced by Drew Barrymore, there was a book with the same title hovering in the New York Bestsellers List for a number of months five years ago.
The writer,the quite dashing Greg Behrendt who was a consultant for ‘Sex and the City’ had observed the number of star crossed romances gone wrong, and one day, as he was listening to the women writers in the hit television show moan and groan about their love lives, Behrendt just finaly said to one gal to stop making excuses for the atrocious behavior she was getting from her boyfriend and just said, "You know what, he's just not that into you. Move on. Get a life.' That line turned into a bestselling book co-authored with Liz Tuccillo, and the book became celluloid reality and had its world premiere last week. Sweet!
Why didn’t anyone warn me to read this book first before embarking on a romantic relationship? It would have saved me a lot of heartache and all encompassing rage at my ex if I read this book first.
Guess what? I’ve replaced George Clooney’s picture with this other list on the wall. It’s a guidepost for me to read everyday until I get it.
1 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Asking You Out
2 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Calling You
3 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Dating You
4 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Having Sex with You
5 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Having Sex with Someone Else
6 He's Just Not That Into You If He Only Wants to See You When He's Drunk
7 He's Just Not That Into You If He Doesn't Want to Marry You
8 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Breaking Up with You
9 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Disappeared on You
10 He's Just Not That Into You If He's Married (and Other Insane Variations of Being Unavailable)
11 He's Just Not That Into You If He's a Selfish Jerk, a Bully, or a Really Big Freak
I've also reread a book that rocked the world of women called THE RULES by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, a Victorian guidepost of manners that surprisingly has worked well with a lot of modern romances. I read it again, and I can’t help but laugh, and roll around the bed giggling. I wouldn’t be putting this guidepost up my wall, but just the same, I’m sticking it in my diary. I’ll be trying this out with a guy I really dig. If it works, then it will be up on my wall in bold letters . Goodbye Clooney! Good Riddance.
To wit, here are the 25 RULES:
* 01: Be a “Creature” Unlike Any Other
* 02: Don't Talk to a Man First (and Don't Ask Him to Dance)
* 03: Don't Stare at Men or Talk Too Much
* 04: Don't Meet Him Halfway or Go Dutch on a Date
* 05: Don't Call Him & Rarely Return His Calls
* 06: Always End Phone Calls and dates First
* 07: Don't Accept a Saturday Night Date after Wednesday
* 08: Fill Up Your Time before the Date
* 09: How to Act on Dates 1,2, & 3 End the date first especially if you like him.
* 10: How to Act on Dates 4 through Commitment Time
* 11: Always end the date first
* 12: Stop Dating Him if He Doesn't Buy You a Romantic Gift for Your Birthday or Valentine's Day
* 13: Don’t See Him More than Once or Twice a Week
* 14: No More than Casual Kissing on the First Date
* 15: Don't Rush into Sex & Other Rules for Intimacy
* 16: Don't Tell Him What to Do
* 17: Let Him Take the Lead
* 18: Don't Expect a Man to Change or Try to Change Him
* 19: Don’t Open Up Too Fast
* 20: Be Honest but Mysterious
* 21: Accentuate the Positive & Other Rules for Personal Ads
* 22: Don’t Live with a Man (or Leave Your Things in His Apartment)
* 23: Don't Date a Married Man
* 24: Slowly Involve Him in Your Family & Other Rules for Women with Children
* 25: Practice, Practice, Practice! (or, Getting Good at The Rules)
* 26: Even if You're Engaged or Married, You Still Need The Rules
* 27: Do The Rules, Even when Your Friends & Parents Think It's Nuts
* 28: Be Smart and Other Rules for Dating in High School
* 29: Take Care of Yourself and Other Rules for Dating in College
* 30: Rules for Dealing with Rejection
* 31: Don't Discuss The Rules with Your Therapist.
* 32: Don't Break The Rules!
* 33: Do The Rules and You’ll Live Happily Ever After!
* 34: Love Only Those Who Love You
* 35: Be Easy to Live With
Happy Dating!! Goodtimes!
(Photograph of the gorgeous George Clooney by Sam Jones for Time Magazine)
