GoodTimes with Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee: (A Happier You) Christmas blog

Notes from Alaia's Diary

There's something about riding in a plane bound home for the Philippines during the Christmas season. . I've seen it often enough - people spontaneously burst out clapping when they see a glimpse of home from their windows,still thousands of feet high above the ground, they stand up and give high fives to each other, the somber atmosphere of the plane is replaced with a fiesta atmosphere.

Often, this men and women have been separated from loved ones for years, often toiling in thankless jobs just to eke out a living to sustain their families back home.

I consider myself one of them since I work abroad as a nurse and send my savings back home to augment my parents'limited resources, helping five younger siblings finish their studies.I am just fortunate that I am single and I can afford to go home to the Philippines every year during my Christmas break, soak in all the festivities, stuff myself with Pinoy food and revel in my family's warm embrace.

I've learned to focus on the positive because if I don't, I'm sure I'll never venture outside my comfort zone,perhaps remain stuck in my home country and have a very low salary and perhaps sink in the dark pits of depression. Although I'm earning well, I can't help but ponder on the what if's.

I read a lot of books to combat my loneliness, watch Wowowee at the Filipino Channel (much as I try, I couldn't really stomach Willie Revillame), and listen to the live or delayed stream of my favorite radio show GoodTimes with Mo, Mojo and Grace Lee at 89.9

In fact, I've recorded a month's worth of shows in my IPod to keep me company as I ride home to Manila.

I've been listening to their December 18 show, and I was struck by Mo's topic about 'Missed Opportunities'. I've had a lot of missed opportunities to ponder about: my biggest regret is about not putting my foot down to study medicine. Instead, I was asked by my family to finish my studies first and work as a nurse so I could send all my younger siblings to college. After they're through school, then I could think about going to medicine.

What if, all those years ago, I've put my foot down? Perhaps, I'll be a doctor now. A penniless doctor, and my siblings are all out in the street, begging for food. That's quite extreme. Of course my Itay will never allow that to happen, and neither would I. But I do dwell on the What if's a lot of the time before.

I look out at my window and look at the skies. It's so beautiful and peaceful. So unlike the turbulent emotions I'm going through as I listen to Mo go on and on asking his callers to recall their missed opportunities.

I let the feelings of sadness overwhelm me at first and then after a minute or two, I let it go.

I look at the book I've kept in the side pocket of my front seat 'Oneness With All Life' by Eckhart Tolle, and stare at it. I've kept this book at my side ever since it was published. When I'm feeling really low, I read, and Tolle's words comfort me.

I open the pages and scan my highlighted words, words that have healed my depression.

Don't seek happiness. If you seek it you won't find it, because seeking is the anithesis of happiness. Happiness is ever elusive, but freedom from unhappiness is attainable now, by facing WHAT IS than making up stories about it.

The primary cause of unhappiness is never one situation but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral, which always is as it is. There is the situation or the fact, and here are my thoughts about it, Instead of making up stories, stay with the facts. For example, "I am ruined" is a story. It limits you and prevents you from taking effective action. "I have 50 cents left in my bank account" is a fact. Facing facts is always empowering.

See if you catch the voice in your head, perhaps in the very moments it complains about something, and recognize it for what it is: the voice of the ego, no more than a thought. Whenever you notice that voice, you will also realize that you are not the voice, but the one who is aware of it. In fact, you are the awareness that is aware of the voice. In the background, there is awareness. In the foreground, there is the voice, the thinker.In this way, you are becoming free of the ego, gree of the unobserved mind.

People believe themselves to be dependent on what happens for their happiness. They don't realize that what happens is the most unstable thing in this universe. It changes constantly. They look upon the present moment as either marred by something that has happened and shouldn't have or as deficient because of something that has not happened but should have. And so they miss the deeper perfection that is inherent in life itself, a perfection that lies beyond what is happening or not happening. Accept the present moment and find the perfection that is untouched by time.

The more shared past there is in a relationship, the more present you need to be; otherwise, you will be forced to relive the past again and again.

You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you and allowing that goodness to emerge.

If peace is really what you want,then you will choose peace.

I hear shouting and stomping of the feet, and when I look out the window, the clouds in the horizon has been replaced by a hint of Manila Bay. And when the crowd sees land, it seems the whole plane is standing up and clapping. The stewardesses are helpless, smile and just say 'Merry Christmas po. Malapit na tayong mag-land sa Pilipinas."

I dab at my eyes and clap along with the crowd. It feels so good to be home. I clutch the book I was reading a while ago. I choose to be present in the moment. I am trying to face the facts of my life at this very moment. I am happy.

(Postscript: The topic 'Missed Opportunities' was a topic Mo dwelt on in his Dec 18 show. This topic kind of haunted my subconscious the whole month of December because I wanted to write in this blog, but can't, due to the hair-raising activities we put ourselves through in preparing for Christmas.

But instead of dwelling on the what if's, and slide to feelings of depression, I just focus on what is, as the book 'Oneness With All Life' by Eckhart Tolle has asked its readers to espouse.

I've thought of a fictional character who've experienced a lot of missed opportunities in her life, and thought of creating Alaia, a nurse coming home to the Philippines for her yearly vacation. She ponders on a lot of what if's but instead focuses on the positive, as we should all do everyday of our lives.

I've experienced too what Alaia has seen inside the plane, when a group of OFW's spontaneously clap, and high five one another as they approach the landing at NAIA.This happens a lot especially when a plane from abroad comes home for Christmas. One can see absolute,pure joy in their faces as they land closer to home.

I wish you peace today. Merry Christmas!!!)

photos of the skies from the plane courtesy of genvessel

Good Times with Mo, Mojo & Grace Lee (Sleepless in Chicago) : December 1, 2008 blog

Notes from Triste's Diary

People have this mistaken notion that Chicago is a city of concrete and glass: a windy,turgid city with cold,soulless people.

Before I transferred here from Manila, I thought the same thing, but once I got here, I never realized that the city is surrounded by Lake Michigan, and that the people are very friendly and down to earth, reminding me that Chicago is a big big city with its Midwest values intact. Think of Oprah and Barack Obama's warmth, and you get my point.

I'm very lucky that the view from my boyfriend's apartment is just fantastic. I get to see the Magnificent Mile (the northern part of Michigan Avenue between the Chicago River and Lake Shore Drive)at all hours of the day in his 66th floor loft, and I never tire of the view, alternately looking at the harbor and the buildings lining by the lake.

It's ironic that the beauty I see outside does not reflect my current emotional state, which is miserable beyond compare! I long to go home to Manila and cry my heart out in familiar surroundings.I'm waiting for the weekday to end, and by Saturday,I might broach this delicate topic over dinner with my boyfriend. Hopefully, I'll be on the way home to spend Christmas with my family.

I'm homesick, and to keep my mind away from feelings of sadness, I while away my time listening to the Good Times show via their website. Or listen to the audio recording when I can't sleep at night.Today's show hit me hard. Listening to caller 'Jason' talking about leaving his girlfriend because she is not Chinese hit the issues affecting me straight in the bull's eye. It's serendipity. A perfect chance to reflect on my life circumstances this moment.

Like Jason, my boyfriend is Filipino-Chinese. I don't know about Jason, but my boyfriend belongs to the top '1% of 1%' category, meaning his family belongs to one of the richest families in the Philippines, as evidenced by his tony address in Lake Shore Drive where he stays while he finishes his MBM at Kellogg Business School of Management.

I don't have one drop of Chinese blood in my veins, and there lies the problem. I met X in Kellogg too, and we've been classmates since the schoolyear started in September.Being both Pinoys in a foreign land, we clicked instantly and in a matter of weeks we fell in love and lived together.

His parents learned a few weeks about it and visited us here in Chicago, and X has not talked about it, but I could feel that he got a lashing from his folks about my background. I'm distantly related to a President, two Senators, perhaps ten congressmen in the Philippines.And yet, I don't seem to add up to their standards? Why? Because my ancestors are not peasants from some remote province in China like Guangduo?

I didn't like it one bit. My boyfriend has been quietly fuming about it too. He just told me that if his inheritance gets screwed, then his parents can stuff their money up their asses. I had to laugh at that one.

It was funny but I had genuine worries. I love my boyfriend very much, and there lies the rub. If I didn't love him, then I'll just be oblivious to the cultural wars going on around me. But I don't want him to be miserable in any way.

I worry too about the shock he will undergo when he loses his inheritance for love. X is used to the Ritz lifestyle: he uses the helicopter in Manila like a taxi, I kid you not.

But to tell you the truth, it's the least of my worries.I wonder if he can survive the ostracism hurled out to him by his family. Will he be still be happy in the future when his kids aren't visited by his parents? Will he still look kindly to me after years of estrangement from his family?

I don't know, and that's why I want to flee to Manila for the holidays. I want to think things over. I'm afraid that this week, my boyfriend will defy everyone and go down on his knees to ask me to marry him. I don't want to see any kind of hesitation on my face.

It's a tough situation I'm in, and the magnificent views outside can't answer the doubts inside my heart.

But I can laugh at the meantime. I hear a dog-catfight in the background, the Twister fighting with Mojo over Jason's problem.

Oh well, a little respite like this goes a long way when one is deep in an emotional hell-hole. For a brief, brief moment, I allow myself to get silly, laugh out loud even if there's no one around. I'll think about my problems again after the radio show ends. In the meantime,I listen in again and Mo Twister is boasting about being in the cover of IQ magazine, and taunts Mojo for being in the cover of 'Dumb-Ass' magazine.. Uh oh. .here they go again :)

(Postscript: Jason is a real caller to the Good Times December 1 show, and his problem is about his conservative Chinese family's objections with his Filipina girlfriend.

It's a common problem in today's times, and I wondered how a fictional character would react with the same problem. Despite finding herself in luxurious circumstances, Triste is miserable, finding out that no amount of money could offset the emotional problems she is inenviably facing.

'Notes from Triste's Diary' is purely fictional and comes from the imagination and point of view of this blogger. Thanks to arch2452 for the Lakeshore Drive photos from the viewpoint of the John Hancock building and the Chicago Harbor. A big thank you too to earnshavian for the view of Lake Michigan during sunset.

I was fortunate to stay at the John Hancock building for a time visiting relatives who lived in this iconic building, and the views are just truly awesome from a very high floor. Many mornings, the window views were foggy because I was literally nose to nose with cloud formations - it was that high! I thought it would be nice to share this experience to all of you readers. Goodtimes!!)

Good Times with Mo,Mojo & Grace Lee (Synchrodestiny in New York) : November 26,2008 blog

Notes from Diggory's Diary

It's quite funny how another person's situation mirrors your own in the same exact way. My dog died a few days ago, and as if the universe can't wait to shake me up some more, I lost my house keys and can't go inside my apartment right now. It's 6:30 pm, and at this ungodly hour, the last time I checked, my building superintendent can't help me open my front door since he needs to rush out to Queens owing to a family emergency.

So here I am at Gotham Coffee Shop, my favorite coffee place at 2nd Avenue (between 68th and 69th streets) in Manhattan, sipping my blues away, wondering why on earth bad things seem to be happening to me lately.

I usually take a breather to clear my mind from my work as a painter, and like clockwork, I stop from 3pm to 5pm, walk to one of the major museums around the area: Guggenheim, MOMA, Frick or the Metropolitan Museum of Art and gaze at the innumerable paintings hanging by their walls. Is it Van Gogh, Matisse or Picasso today? Rembrandt or Goya the next day? I usually take lots of pictures to serve as my inspiration, and download the images while I sip my cappuccino, and clear the visual kinks that hound a painter finishing a work of art.

At 5pm, I rush home, back to my apartment, hook up my laptop and hear a live radio stream from one of my favorite stations in the world and listen to Mo Twister, Mojo and Grace Lee at their Good Times show.

As a guy with a solitary occupation, I usually listen to their radio show when I work late into the night ,preparing for my upcoming exhibit next month at the Chelsea gallery, a stone's throw away from here. As I mix my oils and choose the colors, I listen and get thoroughly amused by those three Musketeers - Mo Twister,Mojo and Grace Lee. Listening to these three incredible people help me boost my energy and calm me when I'm feeling jittery, especially now that the exhibit is four weeks away.
I look at the time and sigh. Better to just listen to the radio show at this coffee shop and wait here until 8pm.

As I listen to the show, I realized that Mo Twister and I have almost identical experiences the past week – he also lost his dog violently, and as if things couldn’t get bad, he was locked out too. Or was it locked in? The Twister called early in the morning through the landline, but I didn’t clearly get it if he was in or out of his apartment.

As I pondered on both of our predicaments, I remembered reading Deepak Chopra’s book “Synchrodestiny” wherein he states that there's no such thing as a meaningless coincidence.

“For more than a decade, I have been fascinated by the idea that coincidence is involved in shaping and shaping our lives. . .each time we have an experience like these, we can choose to dismiss it as a random occurrence in this chaotic world, or we can recognize it for the potentially life altering event it may prove to be. I do not believe in meaningless coincidence. I believe every coincidence is a message, a clue about a particular facet of our lives that require our attention.”

Hmmm. . . so what clues are behind my dog’s tragic death, and the loss of my keys? Is it a clue that my life is out of control? Or that I’m leading a life of senseless violence? Are my paintings meaningless?

“When you live your life with an appreciation of coincidences and their messages, you connect with the underlying field of infinite possibilities. This is when the magic begins. This is a state I call ‘synchrodestiny’ in which it becomes possible to achieve the spontaneous fulfillment of our every desire. Synchrodestiny requires gaining access to a palce deep with yourself, while at the same time awakening to the intricate dance of coincidences out in the physical world. It requires understanding the profound nature of things, recognizing the wellspring of intelligence that endlessly creates our universe, and yet having the intention to pursue opportunities for change as they appear.”

Whew.

“When a coincidence arises, don’t ignore it. Ask yourself, what is the message here? What is the significance of this? You don’t need to go digging for the answers. Ask the question, and the answers will emerge. They may arrive as a sudden insight, a spontaneous creative experience, or they may be something different. Perhaps you will meet a person who is somehow related to the coincidence that occurred. An encounter, a relationship,a chance meeting, a situation, a circumstance will immediately give you a clue to its meaning.”

Well, I had a pretty set of circumstances last week which I still can’t find its rhyme or reason to my life. I have to find time to really be quiet and reflect on what the past events in my life mean.

Meanwhile, Deepak Chopra suggests to keep a journal or diary and find out which powerful and unusual stimuli draws my attention explaining that “those are the things in your environment you need to look at more closely.

Instead of writing on it, I’ve been clipping pictures and images of what catches my attention. I’m drawn to this picture of the serene New York apartment of Law and Order’s Christopher Meloni, designed by his wife Sherman.

What does it mean? What do the views suggest? Perhaps, I need to look at my life from a bird’s point of view and look at it objectively, from afar? Perhaps I need to be more spiritual, since I’m too bound on earthly things? Perhaps my dog is up in heaven, nearer the skies, and the moon and the stars. That’s a nice thought.

My cellphone flashes, and I recognize my building superintendent’s number. He’s home, the text message says.

Time to go home.

I hope Mr.Gumatay can heed the coincidences in his life, and like me, stop and ponder on life’s imponderables. There’s no other way, right? A tragedy is always a perfect time to be silent and to just listen. Perhaps, a clue is just right in front of you. You just have to teach yourself to be more aware.

Goodtimes!

(Postscript: I've started to read Deepak Chopra's 'Synchrodestiny' to attune myself to the larger meaning of coincidences in one's life. Sometimes messages from the universe are to be heeded; sometimes it rolls like a tiny stone and sometimes it comes as a brick wall.

After the twin incidents in Mo Twister's life, I started to think of a fictional character with the same unique set of events happening to his life. Would he ignore it or see a greater meaning behind the events?

In Diggory's case, he started to 'ponder on the imponderables', and perhaps gained an ounce of wisdom in the end.)